Mr Langot 2

Mr. Langot runs home yelling : "Pack your bags Honey, I just won the 10 Million Lotto!"
WIFE: Oh dear! Do i pack for Beaches or Mountains???
Mr. Langot: "WHO CARES??? JUST PACK AND GET LOST..."


After hike in petrol price, Mr.Langot was not worried at all.
When his friend asked him the reason, he said: "How does it matter? Earlier I was filling petrol for Rs.100 in my car, now also I'll fill petrol for Rs.100 only !!"


Museum Curator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.
Mr.Langot: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

Visitor: Whose skeleton is that?
Mr.Langot Tipu's skeleton.
Visitor: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?
Mr.Langot: That was Tipu's skeleton when he was child.

Last 1 for today:

Once in MIT, there was an Indian student named Mr.Langot(ob).
He was very brilliant, and his General Knowledge (GK) was excellent.
He won every Quiz in the institute ....
Once he fell in love with a Phirangi girl...
He proposed to the girl, but she straight away rejected him ... calling him
Bloody Desi...
After this, his GK fell drastically, and he stopped taking part in Quiz
and all.....
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because,

Jab Dil hi toot gaya....
to GK kya karenge ...

Name Guru

why did "shruti"'s frens started calling her "shraxis"?????

Think......................

Think......................


Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................

Think......................









Because UTI Bank is now AXIS Bank................ :)

Santa Banta

Once Santa & Banta were travelling along with their friends Monty & Jaggi. On a road surrounded by forests on both sides, their car was attacked by robbers. Santa & his friends were pulled out of the car. The robbers blasted the car and took Santa, Banta and their friends in the middle of the forest where their boss was residing.

Now, this boss was fond of jokes. So, he put the condition that whoever tells a joke that makes every single person laugh should be left unharmed and alive, but if one single person doesn't laugh then the joke-teller would be shot to death.


Banta started telling the funniest joke he had ever heard, "One day........." and when he was finished, everybody were falling with laughter except Santa. So according to the vow, the boss shot poor Banta.

Now, it was the turn of Monty. He also told the best joke he had ever heard. Again everybody laughed including the boss & his robbers, but still Santa was quite as a statue. So the boss shot him.


Then came Jaggi. As he opened his mouth to tell the joke, Santa suddenly burst into laughter. Everyone was puzzled. Santa was laughing madly.

The boss asked him, "Why the hell are you laughing without hearing the joke?"


Santa said laughing and giggling, "Oh! How funny Banta's joke was!"

What an Escape!!!

A Shikari goes to a jungle for shikar.
while he's enjoying his shikar , he encounters a ferocious elephant.

The elephant starts chasing the shikari. Shikari is scared of the
elephant and gets into his jeep and tries to escape. The elephant
doesn't stop and still continues to chase the shikari now at a faster
pace.

The shikari sees 2 ways in front of him one going to left and the other
going to right. He uses his intelligence to fool elephant and escapes.

Any idea what he does???

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come on don't give up.


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Ok. Here is the answer.

The shikari puts left indicator of the jeep and drives to the right.
The elephant gets confused and stops, thinking where to go.( left or right )

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...

Mr Langot-My new character

Why does not Mr. Langot wake up early.. i.e. when the day dawns.. or sun rises.. but
instead get up when the sun is already shining bright...

Because he has realised the fact that.. "dawn ko pakadna mushkil hi nahin.. na mumkin hain.."

Pandu PJs'!!

Kitta and Pandu are driving in a car.

Kitta puts on the indicator and asks Pandu to check if it is working.

Pandu puts his head out and says: "yes..no..yes..no..yes..no............!!! "

Having lost his donkey, Pandu got down to his knees and started thanking God.

His friend Kitta asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for?"

Pandu replied "I am thanking God for seeing to it that I wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too !!"

Pandu was once standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.

His wife Poongdi asked: "What are doing, honey??"

Pandu said: "I'm seeing how I look while I am sleeping !!!"

Once Pandu fell in love with a nurse.

He wrote his first love letter to her - "I love you, Sister !!!"

After hike in petrol price,

Pandu said: "It doesn't affect me at all. Earlier I was filling petrol for Rs.100 for my Alto, now also I'll fill petrol for Rs.100 only !!"

Teacher Kitta to Pandu: "Correct the sentence, A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"

Pandu : "A cow and a bull is grazing in the field "

Kitta : "How???"

Pandu: "Ladies first"

1 more PJ!

A couple were being introduced for the first time.
The girls parents were first to go:
Yeh hai Hamari pyari
Aamki Pyari
Hum sabki pyari Rampyari!!

The boys parents weren't far behind. They said
Yeh hai hamara ghu
aapka ghu
hum sabka ghu, Raghu!!

If you understood it well and good varna phatke!!

Water on Mars!!

Nasa has struggled so much to find water on Mars and thus prove the existence of life on Mars.. I dont know about life on Mars i have definitely found water on Mars. I present my findings here.



P.S: For real tech updates you can check out my blog Tech Overflow.

Pigeon

Pandu and his wife are on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and deposits a poopy little present on pandu's wife's head.

"Yech!" says pandu's wife. "Get some toilet paper."

Pandu says, "What for? He must be half-a-mile away by now."

Airtel

A dog was chasing Pandu and Pandu was laughing.
Kitta: Why are u laughing?








Pandu: I have an Airtel cell phone but still hutch network is following me.

Auto

When Pandu was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver adjusted mirror.

Pandu shouted, "You are trying to see my wife ? Sit back. I will
drive"

Sotuh Indians!!

Prof Kitta: Why majority of south indians are black ?
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Pandu: Because they always watch Sun TV, Udaya TV, Surya TV without applying sun screen lotion.

Sing a Song!!!

Once Five CHIPKALIs (house lizards) : Phulwa, RaamPyaari, RaamDulari,
RaamPuri and RaamChuri were crawling on the wall when all of a sudden,
Phulwa started to sing a song.

The moment Phulwa stopped singing the song, RaamPyaari,RaamDulari, RaamPuri
and RaamChuri fell down from the wall !!!...

WHY ???

Answer

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Coz, they all started clapping!!!!

Pandu!!

Why Pandu always keep a picture of himself in his room?

So he can use it as a mirror.

Pandu!!

One day Pandu talking with his friend Kitta

Pandu: "Poongdi and I have to learn Telugu within 6 months or
we will not be able to communicate with our child"

Kitta (surprised): "Is it !!!! Why ????"

Pandu: "We have adopted a telugu child from Telangana and it will start to speak after 6 months"

Name Change

Why did the girl changed her name from Shruti to Shraxis?
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Socho… kyun….. ???
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Aur thoda socho
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Ans: Because UTI bank is now Axis bank.

World Cup

Just in case you were still wondering as to why India lost the final of the
2003 world cup after playing so well in the league games, probably here lies the answer…..

The teams that qualified for the super six stage…

India , Sri Lanka , Australia , New Zealand , Kenya ,Zimbabwe .

Note there are two teams each from the continents of Asia ,Australasia &
Africa respectively ..

The teams that have the last alphabet “a” in their names qualified for the
semifinals viz.

Indi’a’ , Australi’a’ , Keny’a’ & Sri Lank’a’.

The teams that have alphabets “ia” at the last of their name qualified for
the Final i.e

Ind “ia” & Austral”ia “.

Now,

Kisne World Cup ”lia” - Austra”lia”

Kisne World Cup “dia” - In”dia”

Helicopter Crash

There is a guy flying a helicopter..

He is going higher and higher thereby it becomes colder and colder..

He then crashes..


Why..


Think..








Think...









It was too cold so he switches off the fans...

Disease

One guy had a very Contiguous disease..

Whenever he opens his mouth near someone else.. the other guy gets the disease..

How does the disease Spread..


Think..










Think..










Because he had a Blue Tooth..

ATM Password

2 sardarji's went to an ATM. one of them(S1) inserts the card into the machine and enters the password.

S2 : Hehe i saw your password. (laughs)
S1 : Tell me what it is.
S2 : it's "****".
S1 : Hehe ... "****" is wrong .. my password is 8431

:-)

Call Center PJ

1 ) Tech Support : "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer : "Ok."
Tech Support : "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer : "No."
Tech Support : "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer : "No."
Tech Support : "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer : "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."

----------------------------------------

2) Customer : "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message."
Tech Support : "Did you install the update?"
Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"


--------------------------------------------------

3)Customer : "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
Tech Support : "Tell me what you've done."
Customer : "I typed 'A: SETUP'."
Tech Support : "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
Customer : "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk'."
Tech Support : "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
Customer : "What?"
Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
Customer: "No..."

--------------------------------------------------

4).Customer : "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
Tech Support : ?!%#$ (welll pretend to smile)

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5).Tech Support : "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, canyou see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer : "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"

Tech support : ##### ***

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6) Tech Support : "What type of computer do you have?"
Customer : "A white one."
Tech support : ******_____####

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7). Tech Support : "What operating system are you running?"

Customer : "Pentium."

Tech support : ////-----+++
--------------------------------------------------

8). Customer : "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal abortion."
Tech support : ??????

--------------------------------------------------

9).Cus tomer : "I have Microsoft Exploder."

Tech Support : ?!%#$
--------------------------------------------------

10).Customer : "How do I print my voicemail?"


Tech support : ??????

--------------------------------------------------

11). Customer : "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to
print document, but the computer won't boot properly."

Tech Support : "What does it say?"

Customer : "Something about an error and non-system disk."

Tech Support : "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"

Customer : "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside."

Tech support : @@@@@
--------------------------------------------------

12). Tech Support: "Just call us back if there's a problem. We're open 24 hours."

Customer: "Is that Eastern time?"

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13). Tech Support : "What does the screen say now?"

Customer : "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."

Tech Support : "Well?"

Customer : "How do I know when it's ready?"

Tech support : *** ---- ++++
--------------------------------------------------



The best of the lot

14). A plain computer illiterate guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty.

Tech: What's the problem?

User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.

Tech: (keep quite)

Tech: You'll need a new power supply.

User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.

Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to replace it.

User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup and it will fix the
problem! All I need is for you to tell me the command.

Tech support:: 10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.

Tech support::(hush hush)
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS
command that will fix the problem.

User: I knew it!

Tech : Just add the line LOAD

NOSMOKE.COM at the end of the
CONFIG.SYS. Let me know how it goes.

10 minutes later.

User : It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking.

Tech : Well, what version of DOS are you using?

User : MS-DOS 6.22.

Tech : That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't
come with NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you the file.
Let me know how it goes.

1 hour later.

User : I need a new power supply.

Tech support : How did you come to that conclusion?

Tech support : (hush hush)

User : Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what you said,
and he started asking questions about the make of power supply.

Tech: Then what did he say?

User: He told me that my power supply isn't compatible with NOSMOKE.

-------------------------------------------------

Hight Of all (Too Good)

15) customer care officer : I need a product identification number right now and may I help u in
finding it out?

Cust: sure

CCO: could u left click on start and do u find 'My Computer'?

Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I find your computer?

Linux Shell's Song

Which song does Linux's Shell sing always.....




think............







think..................






think.................











think...................









ok ... the song is "Tere Bin mein kaise jiya...."







why????????????








think.................






think.................






dont give up man........





think.........................





think..........................





bcoz.... all linux commands reside in "/bin"... so without "bin" shell has nothing to execute...
so without "bin" shell has no importance.....

Hide - N - Seek

An Ant and an Elephant are playing "Hide n Seek" game.

first was ant's turn. Ant closes it's eyes, counts till 100 elephant finding no place to hide goes n stands behind a tree. Ant easily finds elephant and it's elephants turn now.

Elephant closes it's eyes, counts till 100. Ant finds a nice place to hide. It goes inside a nearby temple and hides in one of the corners.

Elephant is still able to find where the ant is. It calls ant asking it to come out of temple..

guess how??

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Elephant finds Ant's slippers outside the temple.

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Tree

In the Advanced Data Structures class,

Teacher : What is a Tree ?

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Student : Adult plant.
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Mosquito and Elephant

A Mosquito( Male ) and Elephant( Female ) both get married one day.
On the first night, Elephant brings milk for the mosquito.
Mosquito drinks the milk and passes away( dies ).


guess why ??



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No..

Mosquito dies because of AllOut :-)

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Ant and Elephant

Ant tells something in Elephant's ear...
Consequence : Elephant faints.

What did Ant say ???

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"Mein Tumhare bachche ki Maa banne waali hoon"

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..

How do you Convert a Cylinder to a Pizza

To Convert a Cylinder to a Pizza..

All you need to do is get a Cylinder of Radius 'z' and Height 'a'.

So volume of a cylinder = pi * r * r *h
= pi*z*z*a
= pizza

LHS = RHS
Hence Proved..


P.S.: This is a PJ....

Bill Gates

Bill Gates Died

Bill Gates passes away and goes up to heaven where he is met by God.

"Well, Bill," said God, "I'm really confused on this one. I'm not sure

whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped

society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world, and yet

you

created that ghastly Windows.

"I'm going to do something I've never done before. I'm going to let you

decide where you want to go."

Bill replied, "Well thanks, God. What's the difference between the two?"

God said, "You take a peek at both places briefly if it will help you

decide. Shall we look at Hell first?"

"Sure" said Bill, "Let's go!"

Bill was amazed! He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear water. There

were thousands of beautiful men and women running around, playing in the

water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the

temperature was perfect.

"This is great!" said Bill. "If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven."

God replied, "Let's go!" and so off they went to Heaven. Bill saw puffy

white clouds in a beautiful blue sky with angels drifting about playing

harps and singing.

It was nice, but surely not as enticing as Hell.

Bill Gates though for only a brief moment and rendered his decision. "God,

I

do believe I would like to go to Hell."

"As you desire," said God.

Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see

how

things were going. He found Bill Gates shackled to a wall, screaming

amongst

the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons.

"How ya doing', Bill?" asked God.

Bill responded with anguish and despair, "This is awful! This not what I

expected at all! What happened to the beach and the beautiful women

playing

in the water?"

"Oh THAT?!" said God. "That was the Screen Saver

A man went to a STD/ISD/PCO SHOP and slapped the

  operator twice.

  :-(

  Guess why ?

  because there it was written "Number dial karne se

  pehele do lagae"



  whats difference between a man jumping from 1st  floor and a man jumping  from
  10th floor? . . . . . . . . . . . . 



 former goes  (hit) aaaaaaaaa 


 later  goes  aaaaaaaaa (hit)



  a tamilian and a sardarji sittin together in a  train.
Tamilian is bored and  wants to talk, he asks sardar "tamil terima?"
  
  Sardar is offended and hits back "punjab tera baap"

U can study and get any certificates.. but u cannot get ur death
certificate

U may have AIRTEL or BSNL connection but when u sneeze u ll say HUTCH

U can bcom an engineer if u study in Engineering college .. u cannot
bcom a president if u study in Presidency College

U can expect a BUS from a BUS stop ... u cannot expect a FULL from FULL
stop

A mechanical engineer can bcom a mechanic but a software engineer cannot
bcom a software

U can find tea in tea cup.. but cannot find world in world cup

U can find keys in Key board but u cannot find mother in mother board

Taaake IT

Question: You are in a boat in the middle of a river. You have 2

cigarettes and have to light any one cigarette. You don't have

anything else with you in the boat? How will you do it?


















































Answer: Take one cigarette and throw it in the water. So the boat

will become LIGHTER........using this LIGHTER you can light the other

cigarette another deadly answer. scroll down a little




































Another solution: You throw a cigarette up and catch it. Catches win

Matches. Using the matches that you win, you can light the cigarette

If that was not enough, one more deadly answer.... scroll down
























Take water in your hand and drop it drop by drop...(TIP - TIP)

"TIP TIP barsa Pani.

Pani ne aag lagayee."

us aag se hamne cigarette jalayee".







































If that was not enough, one more deadly answer.... scroll down































Start praising one cigarette, The other will get jealous & "jalney
lagega"

what is the cube of 13?
Its : SUROOR
wandaring how?
thats bcoz....
TERA * TERA * TERA = SUROOR

































who was the 1st Indian woman fly abroad?
..........sita with ravan





























wht did the kangaroo say when she found her baby missing?
…….Aaila!!!!! kisne mera pocket maar liya






























wht do u call a really colourful tamilian???
Ans: Rangamannar rangrajan



















an elephant falls in luv wid n ant.but Ant's parents r against their marrige…guess y??
they gave a solid reason…**Ladke k dat bahar hai**





























once sardarji saw a very soni kudi in the market & thought..
……kash k ye meri maa hondi to main v inna sona honda..


















Full form of MATHS????
Mentally Affected Teacher Harassing Students…

what wud u call a girl who never laughs??
Ans: hasina :)

Great PJs

Ek aadmi ki 6 ungliyan(6 fingers) hoti hain... sab log use "Hanuman" bulate hain... kyun???
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Ans:kyounki uska nam hanuman hota hai!

what is PJ???















phaltu joke..
what is P+iJ ???


















complex phaltu joke...
why dont we laugh on a it???


































coz the joke part is imaginary!!!
Whats the opposite of Real??































Its COCONUT....













Y....Socho...???















Becuase it is 'Na-Real'

i'll write a book an pjs and dedicate it to whom? our president....why
scroll down for answer
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coz he is mr. a.P.J.abdul kalam
what is the vector form of sridevi????
???
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ANS : - TABU!!!!
confused???? why????
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ok i'l tell you...
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. sridevi did chandni and tabu did chandni bar!!!!!
What would Dharmendra say to Hema Malini if he wants to tell her to call
him up...?
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Ring De Basanti :))

A dentist was examining a patient having a highly contageous deadly disease....
As soon he opens the patients mouth the disease gets transferred to the doctor... how??
scroll


































...Because the patient had a bluetooth!!

wat is one word in english for kiye karaye par paani ferna??

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flush!!

three cockroaches were going on the road, suddenly one of them started singing the song -- AASHIQ BANAYA AAPNE.
Few mins later, all the three cockroaches died......any idea why?????
COZ the song is HIT......

The Time Machine!!

I have a strong suspicion that our college, the NITK, has a Time Machine.. Yes, u read it right, a Time Machine!! Now, why do i say so?? Go check the placement website. A notice there says "PC's meeting summoned at 4:00 PM on 31/07/1984 in Mining Department, attendance is mandatory."

Deadliest PJ's Collection

Which song will a kid sing when he starts going to 1^st std.?
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KG kiya re, KG kiya re
Oh KG, KG kiya re….


>Proceed at your own risk...
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Gulshan Grover is riding a bike at the velocity of light.
>On the way he offers a lift to a stranger.
>
>
>Stranger: 'Sir, can I know your name please'
>Gulshan : 'I am Gulshan Grocer'
>Stranger : Grocer? Sure you dont mean Gulshan Grover??
>Gulshan: No it is Grocer.
>
>
>Now tell me why did Gulshan say so...
>scroll down for the ultimate PJ
>
>
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>Further,,,
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>Little further...
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>ANS: Because at the speed of light V=C

------------------------------------------------------------
And this is the latest one....
>enjoy....................
>
>) Smoking
>2) Drinking
>3) Charas
>4) Ganja
>5) Chicken
>6) Mutton
>7) Oily food
>8) Masala
>9) Sleep & obesity
>10) Pollution
>
>
>= Heart Attack
>
>
>means...
>
>
>
>scrolll down
>
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>
>
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>
>
>DUS bahane karke le gaye DIL !!


------------------------------ ------------------------------ --------------

What's the opposite of "Dominoes"???
>
>
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>think
>
>
>tired of thinking???
>
>
>Well the answer is "Domi doesn't know"

------------------------------ ------------------------------ --------------

Whats the opposite of "Pizza Hut"
>
>
>....
>
>
>
>......
>
>
>okei don't kill me "Pizza Hutna math"
>

>_____________________________ ____________________ ______________________
_
>
>Acha last one...............
>
>ok whats the opp of venky's..
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>venlocks...
>(now,now,dont bang ur head plz..)
>
>
>

_____________________________ ____________________ ______________________

>What is the opposite of Subramnium Swamy?
>
>
>Subramanium Didn't See Me.
>
>
>
>
>
>How do they start a road race in Tamil Nadu?
>
>
>Ready....Steady.....PO

----------------------------- ------------------------------ ------------

A guy phones up his Boss, but gets the bosses' wife instead.
>
>
>"I'm afraid he died last week." she explains.
>
>
>The next day the man calls again and asks for the boss.
>
>
>"I told you" the wife replies, "he died last week."
>
>
>The next day he calls again and once more asks to Speak to his boss.
>
>
>By this time the wife is getting upset and shouts, "I'VE ALREADY TOLD
>YOU >TWICE, MY HUSBAND, YOUR BOSS, DIED LAST WEEK!
>
>
>WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING?"
>
>
>"Coz," he replied laughing, "I just love hearing it..."

_____________________________ ____________________ ______________________

A guy is traveling in a deluxe car in the desert. He wants to take a
>bath, >but he hasn't got a soap and there is no water anywhere
around...
>
>
>what can he do?
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>->>He will integrate his d-lux car to get Lux + c (constant of
>integration)
>Using the lux soap he will take bath in the 'c'.
>
>

>_____________________________ ____________________ ______________________

>one day a man calls his wife from his IDEA mobile >his call gets
cross connected to some other lady.They still keep on >talking..they
start liking each other..and finally they get married
>
>
>what MORAL do u get???
>..
>..
>..
>..
>..
>
>..
>...
>An IDEA can change your wife.

_____________________________ ____________________ ______________________

>A man went to a STD/ISD/PCO SHOP and slapped the operator twice.
>
>
>
>
>
>:-(
>
>
>Guess why ?
>
>

>
>
>because there it was written "Number dial karne se pehele do lagae"



-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

if a CAT crosses ur way , when u are going some where , then what does it mean???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

?

?

?

it means that the Cat is also going somewhere

------------------------------ -------------------------------------------------------------------------

rahul gandhi --> mom, aapaki wajah se meri shaadi nahi ho paaa rahi........................................

sonia gandhi --> kyun beta????????????????

rahul gandhi --> har taraf to likha hai ki sonia ko bahumat do

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

BRUCE LEE was a great man

But after his sister gave birth to a baby he became an ordinary man...

why?

Because he became

MAMU LEE!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

santa and banta r discussing---------

santa----- "if i drink coffee, i ca'nt sleep!!!!"

Banta----- "with me it's the opposite.if i sleep i can't drink coffee."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
One day Ravan went to a disco.........................

aur wahan jaakar woh behosh ho gaya...................
kyun???????????????????

kyun??????????????

bcoz it was written on the gate than "entry fee Rs.1500 per head"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
who make Ganesh to Anesh...????

ThinK......

Think......

okay....

" KAILASH KHER "

tere naam se " G " loon....

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ek din ek aadmi apne naukar ko Priya Gold biscuit laane bolta hai. To

naukar biscuit laane Pakistan jaata hai.

Kyon??????

Think............

Give up??

Coz...

"Priya Gold biscuit. Haq se maango."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One day, Mickey Mouse asks Donald Duck to tell him Ramayana.
Donald duck is impressed and starts reading verses from Ramayana.
Mickey Mouse continues to listen .
After completing the whole Ramayan, Donald Duck lets out a
Big sigh
and asks Mickey Mouse, "Mickey Mouse, tell me...who was the father of
Lord Ram?
"Mickey Mouse cannot. Angry, Donald duck, again asks, " Mickey
Mouse!!!
Tell me...which was the capital of Ram's kingdom!
"Mickey Mouse cannot answer again.
Infuriated, Donald Duck kicks Mickey Mouse hard, and Mickey Mouse
Goes and collides with a wall. As soon as he collides with the wall, he gets
up
and starts saying verses of Ramayana from start to end...






How did this happen???







Think .... Think .... Think .... Think ....

After hitting the wall, Mickey becomes Wall-Mickey (Valmiki) .

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ok next one………..

JISKA EK BI DOST NAI USKO KYA BOLTE???
..
..
..
..
..
..
"koena mitra" (koi-na-mitra)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Once rani mukharjee was given punishment 2 eat 1000 chewingums.
she was scared bt den suddenly saif ali khan said sumtin in her ears n she started eatin how???
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..

..
coz saif said"chak de chak de,chakde sare GUM,chakde chakde chakde,tere sung hai hum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Suppose ek ladki baarish me bheeg rahi hai to tum use pani se kaise bachaoge?
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..simple hai yaar...use apna dil dedo...dil CHAHTA(umbrella) hai!!!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Ek calculator dusre calci ko kya bola?
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..

..
.."CASIO???"...(kaisi-ho?)


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

WHOS DA ONLY PLAYER WHO KNOS EACH N EVRY RELIGIOUS SONG?

...

..
..
..
..
..
..
..
.
..

HAR-BHAJAN-SINGH

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Agar aap 90 baar paap karoge to keval 45 baar hi pakde jaoge......batao kyu????

..

..
..
because....

..
..
..
..


sin 90=cot 45
-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: why are dogs afraid to look good?

..
..



A: because hot ones are eaten up.

---------------------------------------------------------
why is 45 degree always blushing
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
cause ppl call it a-cute angle
---------------------------------------------------

Why did the boy disconnect the calling-bell in his house?
.
.
.
..
..
..

..
.


A)Because he wanted to win the No-Bell Prize.

---------------------------------------------------------------
Why do computer programmers confuse Halloween and Christmas? ..
..
..
..
..

..
..

Because oct31=dec25.

.

.

.